Ranking The Star Fox Series

I love the Star Fox series, I can’t even express in words how much I love this series. I’ve been playing since 1997 nonstop, and hopefully we get a new entry in the series sooner rather than later. But for now I’m in the mood to reflect and rank the series and reexamine my opinion on the games and series in general.

8. Star Fox Command

Yeah let’s get this out of the way, this game is trash lol. This is really the only Star Fox game I dislike in general, the other games have some things I don’t like, but Star Fox Command really is the embodiment of the worst things Star Fox has done and put them into one game. From the beginning, the artsyle is not appealing to look at, having to use the stylus to control your ship is borderline unplayable, having every stage be in all range mode is boring and monotonous, and we can’t forget the non canon story with 9 endings that feels like it takes forever to do. Honestly the only good things about this game is the music, playing as different characters, and some of the endings are hilarious. Avoid this at all costs.

7. Star Fox 2

I’m honestly fascinated with Star Fox 2, it’s not this low because it’s bad (It’s not a bad game at all), it’s here because of the history surrounding it and how it was one of Nintendo’s lost relics. I look at it like a historian discovering a brand new artifact that was once considered lost to the sands of time. So much of what defines Star Fox came from this game, all range mode, charge shots, Star Wolf, the walker, a map of the Lylat System, so much of the series’s identity is owed to this game. Plus the game runs so much better than the original which is a plus.

6. Star Fox Adventures

Easily the most infamous game of the series, I can’t even begin to count how many times this game has been mocked, insulted, ridiculed, and just outright laughed at. While it doesn’t deserve all of it, it definitely deserves a good chunk of criticism. For anyone who doesn’t know the story by now, Rare was developing Dinosaur Planet when Shigeru Miyamoto looked at it and saw the main character looked like Fox McCloud and went “Let’s make it a Star Fox game.”, and the result is a Star Fox game that’s more like a hand me down Zelda game. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad game, and I have to be in a certain mood to play it, but it’s not a Star Fox game in the way we know it. Either play it to make fun of it, or out of genuine curiosity is completely up to you.

5. Star Fox

The original that started it all, despite how much it chokes on the frame rate I still find myself feeling pretty positive about the game overall. Having the three branching paths gives some nice replayability that would be a staple in the future, and the music does kick some ass, even though it’s not my favorite soundtrack in the series. That being said, a couple of bosses are a pain in the ass, and the game can be hard to follow at times due to the frame rate. But overall I think despite that the game still holds up well, it’s just that there are better games that surpass it.

4. Star Fox Assault

I think this might be the most divisive game in the series, either people love it or hate it. I think this is a fantastic Star Fox game overall, a good progression of the series, something I hope the next game does. The multiplayer is the best of the series, not surprising with the amount of ships, weapons, characters, and maps you have access to. It really did help that this came out when Halo was beginning to peak so giving a series like Star Fox this benefited the game greatly. Assault also has what I consider the best soundtrack in the series without question, it’s just so damn good. The only bad things I have to say about the game is that the on foot missions suck, the landmaster controls like crap, and the linear story mode is alright. But the negatives don’t outweigh the positives, this is a great entry in the series and is a must play if you’re a Star Fox fan.

3. Star Fox Zero

I will die on the hill that not only is this a good game, it’s one of the best games in the series. I think the biggest problem this game has outside of the game itself, it was doomed because it was on the Wii-U, which was a sinking ship by the time this game came out. As for the game itself, repeating the same storyline from 64 and the gamepad controls were the main reasons why so many turned away from this game. Oh and the gyrowing but I completely forgot about it. But hot damn does this game do so many things right, the banter between characters, music is just right, the controls are really good, and the overall action kicks ass. But to me the best part of the game is having actual modes to play, the main game, arcade mode to test your skills, training mode to get a feel for the game, and online mode to play with friends. Going forward I want Star Fox to expand on these modes and go even further to give us the best Star Fox experience.

2. Star Fox 64 3D

Originally I was planning to put this alongside the original game, but I figured I have plenty to say about this remake. First of all, the remake is fantastic, the graphic glow up is amazing, plays the same, and the soundtrack is still awesome. I will say the option to choose a stage and save your game gives this version of the game points in its favor. The only reason why this isn’t at the top is because I’d prefer to play with a controller than a 3DS.

1. Star Fox 64

Like come on, what else could it be? The uncontested gold standard of the series, considered to be one of the greatest games of all time, the magnum opus of rail shooters. No other game comes as close to perfection as this one and the game to introduce the Rumble Pak that would become a mainstay feature in gaming in general. Even the worst parts of the game in Aquas is still pretty good, the action is immaculate, the voice acting is legendary, having 25 different routes gives it the best replayability in the series. Why are you still reading this? Go and play this game now!

Spider-Man and the Status Quo Problem

Status Quo: The existing state of affairs. How often do we hear in real life or in fiction the words “Maintaining the Status Quo”? In fiction we see this as the way to keep a series the way it is, whether it’s video games, comics, movies, cartoons, etc. I’ve seen this used in many comics and cartoons, especially episodic adventure cartoons, where no matter how wacky hi jinks the characters get into, they will find a solution that ends up maintaining the status quo, no matter how stupid it is. While nowadays we have shows that have more progressive storytelling we still get those that are episodic from time to time.

But maintaining the status quo is not always a good thing, and today I want to talk about the most famous superhero that is currently suffering the most from this: The Amazing Spider-Man.

Once upon a time, Peter Parker was a normal teenage boy who got bitten by a radioactive spider, got powers and became Spider-Man, and has gone on to have many adventures in the Marvel universe. As the comics progressed Peter grew up and graduated from college, and eventually got married to Mary Jane Watson. So with that and Peter having all his adventures, one would think Marvel would let their most famous superhero be happy right?

This is where Marvel suddenly went “We will make it our life’s goal to make Peter Parker’s life as miserable as possible!”

Listen, I don’t know what goes on in the heads of the people writing comics or execs at Marvel, but what I do know is that someone decided to “Maintain the Status Quo”, which apparently means to undo all the progress Peter has had for decades. I’m sure most people know what One More Day is by now, but if you don’t then basically the infamous story involves Peter and MJ selling their marriage to the devil, undoing decades of character progression to save Aunt May, who’s very old at this point, and was probably gonna die soon anyway.

You can see why this was a very stupid thing to do, and since then Marvel has done everything possible to not only revert Peter to a man-child, but will go out of their way to ruin Peter’s life and make sure he never gets with MJ. don’t even get me started with the bullshit with fucking Paul and that trainwreck of a self-insert.

So with all of this I just have to ask, why? Why Peter? And why make arguably the most popular comic book superhero of all time suffer so damn much? What’s the freaking point of it all?! The “Status Quo” argument is just a bullshit argument, and we know this because so many other popular characters have grown and not be held back by the status quo.

This whole thing makes less sense when we have other fictional characters progressing and living happy lives. Superman is happily married and has a kid, Batman has his Bat-Family that he’s made, Sailor Moon ends up getting married with a child soon to be born by the end of her manga, for God’s sake, not only is Goku married, he’s a grandfather now! Some of the most famous and iconic superheroes today can progress their lives, but Peter for some bullshit reason can’t?!

Someone at Marvel needs to do something soon, because everyone hates the shit Marvel is putting Peter through for no reason other than to just watch him suffer, especially when he’s treated better in everything that isn’t 616. Because I refuse to have some stupid self insert (Which I find funny because Sailor Moon is a self insert character and she turned out well) be another cog in the Ruin Peter’s Life Machine. Spider-Man is one of the most iconic superheroes in fiction and deserves to have his character and story progress, not be the eternal punching bag for Marvel.

Sailor Moon Cosmos Review

 

After over a year of waiting for the finale of Sailor Moon Crystal I finally got the chance to sit down and watch Sailor Moon Cosmos. It feels weird, the last 10 years of this journey with Sailor Moon Crystal’s had its ups and downs but we’ve finally reached the end, so how did it turn out?

For those that don’t know, Sailor Moon Cosmos covers the final arc of the Sailor Moon manga, the Stars Arc, which I consider to be the Namek Saga of Sailor Moon. It takes everything that was built up to this point and basically throws them out the window. And since this is the final arc it will have major spoilers so spoilers beware!

So within 10 minutes into Part 1, Mamoru gets fucking dusted by Galaxia and has his star seed taken. This is one of the greatest villain entrances I’ve ever seen, Galaxia doesn’t say shit, she just kills him, smirks at Usagi, and leaves. This is one of the major points of this arc and why it works so well. Up until now, the Sailor Scouts have defeated everything that’s come their way and protected the planet. In less than 10 minutes, Galaxia has not only disrupted everything, her very existence makes it that no one is safe, and that Usagi might not be able to save the day this time.

This is psychological torture at its finest, and before everything is over, Galaxia is going to push Usagi past the breaking point in ways that would make Frieza jealous. This is one of the reasons why I compare it to the Namek Saga, the main characters fighting what seems to be an incomprehensible enemy that pushes them past their breaking points. In this case, Galaxia aims to destroy everything Usagi loves so the two have their inevitable confrontation. One by one the scouts get killed off to take Usagi to the brink. This includes the Sailor Starlights who I found to be way more likable in this than in the 90’s anime, where they were hostile assholes for no reason.

The pacing is really good, as they manage to get everything down considering the arc is only 11 chapters, the animation and soundtrack are all top notch as well. Watching the girls do their signature transformations and attacks truly never got old for me no matter how many times they repeated them, as is tradition lol. As Part 1 ends, we see Usagi gathering the strength to face Galaxia, but unknown to her, what awaits her is her ultimate destiny…

Part 2 wastes no time as Usagi and the starlights head towards the center of the Milky Way Galaxy. With each intense battle, more and more scouts are killed to end the Sailor Wars, including the now revived and brainwashed scouts to kill Usagi. Again, Galaxia making Frieza jealous at how she’s torturing Usagi at every corner. This is the biggest and most important point of the entire arc: What does Usagi do when everything and everyone has been ripped from her, and she can’t do anything about it? Finding what courage she has, she unleashes her power on the brainwashed scouts, reverting them to their star seeds, which finally leads us to the confrontation between Sailor Moon and Sailor Galaxia.

For those who’ve only seen the anime, Galaxia is controlled by Chaos after sealing it within her, here in Cosmos? She is a ruthless empress, hellbent on obtaining the ultimate power in the cosmos, and it’s here we learn in her backstory being born in a hell planet and one day getting her sailor crystal, with her quest of taking what she believes is hers. Galaxia is the perfect foil to Usagi, as she despises everything mortal and finite, not caring about life and love, By contrast, Usagi has always been one that has always embraced what is imperfect, she knows nothing lasts forever, and that’s why she cherishes her loved ones. And it’s with this knowledge Galaxia proves why she is the best villain of the manga, as she sends the crystals and Mamoru into the Galaxy Cauldron, essentially erasing their existence, and Chibiusa’s as well when she threw Mamoru into the cauldron, not only erasing the two most important people in Usagi’s life, but the third and second most important characters in the manga in Chibiusa and Mamoru respectively.

With Usagi past her breaking point, the power Galaxia’s wanted for so long has been unleashed, and so has Chaos as it nearly kills Galaxia and starts corrupting the Galaxy Cauldron, only for her to be saved by Usagi. We learn that all the bad guys throughout the series were simply incarnations of Chaos, all for the sole purpose of bringing Usagi here to take the Silver Crystal and rule the cosmos. Distraught, Galaxia breaks down knowing she couldn’t beat Usagi or Chaos, proclaiming the war lost. At the same time Chibi Chibi pleads with Usagi to destroy both Chaos and the cauldron so there can be no more suffering, but no more stars will be born.

With Chaos fused with the cauldron preparing to corrupt the cosmos, Galaxia given up, and Chibi Chibi desperate to end it all, this is where we see Usagi’s defining moment of the series and the embodiment of her very character…

“You know, I’ve never fought for the sake of peace or justice. I’ve only been fighting to protect those I love, for my comrades.”

When Goku became the Super Saiyan it forever changed how he saw himself and changed the way we saw him, the monkey boy we loved was always there, but from that moment on we would also see the saiyan warrior that made the self-proclaimed emperor of the universe quake in fear. Usagi from the moment she became Sailor Moon to now staring Chaos in the face, was and still is the ditzy, crybaby girl who fought to protect everyone she loved, no matter if they are destroyed or erased. It serves as the ultimate expression of her character while breaking her down to her very core as she goes to embrace Chaos and save everyone and the galaxy.

Throughout the series we see the romance of Serenity and Endymion and the trials and tribulations that they endured. We watched Usagi’s journey of becoming this soldier of love and justice and the power of love that helped her become the strong woman she becomes at the end. We see the theme of loneliness and how so many characters are brought together in different ways to belong somewhere and be one with someone. And I could not think of a better ending for Sailor Moon Cosmos than the wedding of Usagi and Mamoru, finally bringing the romance of Serenity and Endymion to its ultimate well deserved conclusion after all the tragedy and heartache. I absolutely recommend this to any and all Sailor Moon fans who’ve been watching the series up to this point.

As I end Sailor Moon Crystal I think about how Sailor Moon in general has challenged me to embrace the unknown and try things I never thought I’d do. It’s been a very long journey with Sailor Moon Crystal, and while I don’t know what the future holds for Sailor Moon, it makes me very excited for what could be next and hope only good thing are in store for the future of this series. I hope that like Usagi, you embrace the unknown and head towards the future.

Most Wanted Death Battle Matchups

The fun thing about Death Battle is seeing so many people talk about and show their favorite matchups they they want to see, and that what this is gonna be, what matchups I personally would love to become an eventual episode.

Captain Underpants Vs. Captain Planet

I think this would be a hilarious matchup between the two captains, given how completely ridiculous both are in their own worlds, I expect cartoon shenanigans similar to Saitama Vs. Popeye.

Cell Vs. Metal Sonic

Cell is the pretty much the big Dragon Ball villain left that hasn't been in Death Battle yet. And considering Sonic has a lot in common with Dragon Ball, this matchup ultimately makes a lot of sense. Plus this would bring Metal Sonic back into Death Battle, and since he's one of my favorite Sonic characters this would be a great match to have.

Banjo-Kazooie Vs. Yooka-Laylee

Again like with the previous matchup, this makes complete sense. We already have a good duo matchup in Jak and Daxter Vs. Ratchet and Clank, so this would absolutely work. Plus Banjo-Kazooie like Conker are so overdue for a Death Battle anyways.

Mario-Kun Vs. Archie Sonic

Since we got a third Goku Vs. Superman, Mario Vs. Sonic 3 is pretty much bound to happen at this point, the issue is how to do it? We've had them use canon versions only and compositing them both, so at this point the only thing to do is to use the most powerful versions of Mario and Sonic.

Eds Vs. Warners

As you can tell, I love cartoons and love cartoon themed based death battles. I just think they allow for near unlimited creativity, Bill Cipher Vs. Discord is easily the best example of this. So a matchup between these crazy ass kids is a goldmine just waiting to happen.

Tom and Jerry Vs. Itchy and Scratchy

If there was any cartoon that was made for something like Death Battle, these two are prime candidates. Both are notorious for being ultraviolent, but one has blood, death, etc. Plus, not only do we get one of the all time classic cartoons in Tom and Jerry, we also get The Simpsons in as well, the original vs the parody would make for a good time.

Star Fox Vs. Rogue Squadron

This has been a request that I've wanted for such a long time, and something that Death Battle themselves have been hoping to do. I've seen people talk about how it was planned in earlier seasons, Community Death Battles have been done over it, even a DBX on Arwing Vs. X-Wing, it's all been leading to this and I hope that should Death Battle come back, this big time matchup gets the treatment it deserves.

Goku Vs. Sailor Moon

There's no way I could end a list like this without my remaining most wanted matchup. I don't think I even need to explain why I want this so badly, I even made my own script for this matchup. For those that don't know, this was originally planned after Goku Vs. Superman 1 but ultimately scrapped, so for a fan of my two favorite anime of all time, the hype and hope for this matchup is through the roof. It's also a very intense matchup so the salt for the outcome will definitely be up there, no doubt about that. Goku needs an opponent that isn't Superman anyway, so why not his other iconic rival?

Top 10 Death Battle Episodes

Death Battle is a show that I have a lot of history with. I've been watching it since it started all those years ago in 2010 with tons of memories of the days of ScrewAttack. With this top ten I wanted to express why Death Battle has not only become a favorite among shows I’ve watched, but overtime has become a cultural zeitgeist for the internet as a whole. I’m not gonna waste anymore time, let’s get into my personal favorite Death Battle episodes.

10. Balrog Vs. TJ Combo

We start this list with what is probably the second best hand to hand fight of the entire series, not to mention a rivalry episode between two iconic video game fighting franchises. While Street Fighter has one of the worst records in the show’s history (4-9), the episodes range from decent to great, and this is easily the best episode any Street Fighter character has had. Killer Instinct is better off with a 3-3 record overall, but like with Street Fighter, this is easily the best episode. A good old fashioned boxing match between two heavy hitters, one who’s basically one of M. Bison’s right hand man fights to satisfy his greed and desire for power, the other has a backstory that would make Rocky proud. The analysis does a good job hyping up both boxers, but it’s the fight, and the music, itself that makes this an all time great. By the way, go listen to the song in this episode, Mick Gordon and Omega Sparx did such a good job with this.

The fight itself is a good old slugfest that is basically TJ fighting someone who is essentially his past self, and damn wouldn’t that make a great boxing movie? But yeah this had such good hype from beginning to end, and that last part at the end has become one of the most iconic moments in all of Death Battle. In a series where we characters warping reality or destroying multiverses, it really says something that one of the greatest episodes is just a boxing match.

9. Frieza Vs. Megatron

In hindsight I should have known this matchup would be badass. For years I’ve heard very negative opinions on this matchup, but it’s two very iconic villains, and having two villains fight is one of my favorite types of matchups just so both can trash talk to each other. This matchup is also a reminder that just because a matchup is a stomp, doesn’t mean that it is automatically bad. Not much to say on Frieza, he’s THE villain of Dragon Ball for a reason, but Megatron’s analysis is what surprised me, especially the end of it. Devilartemis shows why he’s one of the very best animators, but my personal favorite moment is at the end, when Megatron verbally demolishes Frieza even though he’s pretty much lost. And of course Cybertron blows up, because it’s Cybertron, LOL.

8. Bill Cipher Vs. Discord

To say that this matchup has history would be an understatement. I remember when this matchup got straight up banned in the discord server just because of how toxic the discussions got, it made me wonder how an actual episode would be. As it turns out, one of craziest, yet best episodes in the shows history. Besides watching Gravity Falls, I was fairly neutral on this episode, but the reality warping that was displayed here is the very best we’ve gotten on the show, and I understand why people were underwhelmed with Strange Vs. Fate. This also has without a doubt the best pyrrhic victory in the show, I won’t spoil it, but I will say it was an awesome way to conclude this battle.

7. Galactus Vs. Unicron

When Death Battle started people requested many matchups to be made for future episodes, out of all of them, this matchup has been THE most requested in the show’s history. So it makes sense that not only would this be the finale to what is the show’s best season, but literally the biggest battle in the show’s history. This is an episode that benefits from the analysis, because these two are stupid overpowered, even for comics. Of course my favorite part was them talking about drunk Orson Welles, as a drama/theater major that got a laugh out of me. As far as finales go, this will be really hard to top.

6. Megazord Vs. Voltron

This battle is pretty infamous for a few reasons. For one, this is where I noticed that views would start to decrease a bit, partly because the popular one lost. But really, this episode is infamous because of all the stuff that happened trying to get this episode made. If you don’t know, just go watch the Death Battle Cast episodes where they talk about it, but making the models for the Megazord and Voltron were a pain in the ass that took lots of time and money, hell I remember Ben saying they lost money because of this episode. With all the crazy shit this episode went through, this is still one of the very best episodes. The fact that Megazord and Voltron look great is a big factor, but the fight is just an awesome, simple fight from beginning to end. This is one of those episodes that I point to when people ask what Death Battle is about.

5. Scooby-Doo Vs. Courage

When this was announced I had a good laugh, but like everyone else I didn’t want either one to die. Thankfully this is one of the only times where a draw was a good thing. They are not just good boys, they are the goodest of boys, no I don’t care if that’s not a word! I’ve noticed that in the last few years people have developed a negative attitude towards toon force and cartoon characters, go look at Saitama Vs. Popeye on why. But you honestly couldn’t have had a better episode for these two loveable cowards, it really felt like another cartoon made just for them. And Eustace totally got what he deserved.

4. Flash Vs. Archie Sonic

Ah yes, the infamous Speed Force episode, or another example of how stupidly overpowered comics, DC in particular, can truly be. When this was announced I remember both sides at each other’s throats saying why their pick wins this fight, basically was at the level of Bill Vs. Discord long before that matchup was a thing. And right up until the episode came out, it really seemed like Archie Sonic was gonna pull off the impossible, but that damn Speed Force changed everything. As for the episode itself, it was very interesting learning about what Wally could do and his history while remembering how crazy Archie Sonic was at the time. The analysis and the end to the fight are the best parts of the episode, it’s always fun learning about characters you don’t know or have forgotten. As far as deaths go, punching Sonic so hard every version of him gets erased has to be one of the best ways to beat an opponent in the series.

3. Trunks Vs. Silver

At first I didn’t think much of this matchup, I know Dragon Ball and Sonic episodes will be good, however Trunks and Silver aren’t my favorite characters from either series, especially Silver given how he debuted in Sonic 06. However this wasn’t the canon versions, it was Xeno Trunks and Archie Silver, and that right there made for a way more interesting matchup. What we got was possibly the best Dragon Ball episode that didn’t have a certain Saiyan in it. Everything was on point, the analysis, the fight, the freaking song! Seriously Hedge of Tomorrow is a banger and a must listen. But I think the best thing this did was make Silver really cool for the very first time, that final one line he gives is up there with Death Battle’s very best.

2. Goku Vs. Superman

THE Death Battle. The fight to end all fights. If there is one matchup that not only defines Death Battle, but Vs Debating in general, it's this. Goku Vs. Superman has become such an iconic matchup that it has become part of internet culture and history. Believe it or not, I didn’t know this was a thing before Death Battle brought it up. Goku Vs. Superman 2013 is the ageless classic, no matter how outdated the analysis and animation is, it's still the longest fight in the show’s history for a reason. I know Goku Vs. Superman 2 isn’t looked at fondly but I still have fun memories of the match and SGC, watching it all go down on Twitch as we watch a live action Goku Vs. Superman fight at SGC is stuff we g1s still fondly talk about to this day. As for Goku Vs. Superman 2023, it’s easily the best of the three analysis and animation wise there’s no doubt there. If there’s a matchup that I point to when people want to watch Death Battle, it’s always this matchup, but for me there’s one matchup that in my opinion truly defines these debates…

1. Mario Vs. Sonic

If you were around for ScrewAttack, you know how huge this matchup was. This not only the big matchup that defined Death Battle before Goku Vs. Superman, but this is the rivalry that defined my childhood since I started playing video games, so pretty much my whole life lol. I think it’s pretty self explanatory why this is my top matchup, it’s the only one where the two had an actual real life battle because of the SNES/Genesis console wars. It’s been a roller coaster watching these two characters as the years pass, being mortal enemies, having Sega putting Sonic games on Nintendo consoles, Smash Brawl, pretty much leading to these two episodes. The first is a no doubt classic, not much else to say honestly. Mario Vs. Sonic 2018 is so vastly superior, it’s also the 100th episode and when Death Battle adopted the rules that they implement today. Yeah I don’t care what people say about the verdict being wrong due to only using the games or “getting their characterizations wrong”, which is a bunch of bullshit by the way, this is not only the definitive Mario Vs. Sonic episode, it was the turning point for Death Battle and a celebration of why we love doing stuff like this. Until the next one is announced and the debating can start all over again.